April 25, 2005
And You Thought We Were Done - Amsterdam Part I
Yes, this is a temporary yet early detour from our recent retirement. In fact, it's hard to convince yourself to retire when you just spent the past 72 hours in Amsterdam with a dozen of your whitest black friends. Or at least 11 of your normal friends and your one whitest black friend. You know who you are Mr. "I Got A Hundred Million Clips...."
In any event, Amsterdam had to be chronicled and who better than us right? I mean, besides for the KiDD (now broke by the way....) from Rio, who else can puff, drink, crush, snort, wallow, swallow, wretch, slobber, jab, upper-cut, grenade, wax and violate better than my retard friends? Very few people. Very few.
So here goes - Amsterdam 101.
At Newark airport. Gav was kind enough to bring a case of Miller Lites with him to the gate. Genius! Fucking Genius!
Miller Lite. For the taste of course.
Please, no pix of the fat guy.
The anti-hero of the trip. Did I mention that this guy drove to the airport with 2 other dudes - Gav and Jizzy. They polished off a bottle of Jack just in the car ride to the airport. The first thing that Borka did when it saw me was tackle me. The first thing that Borka did when it saw Fish was kick him in the balls. By the way, do Fish even have balls?
It has begun.
He rode up and down on this bannister from the duty free shop to the bar and back.
More pix!!! Click below to read entry in full.
Unfortunately, Borka maintained it's footing here.
A handle of Jack - never leave home without it. Especially when flying trans-atlantic and the airline charges $5 per cocktail. F that.
This Jack would ultimately lead to the following announcement by the pilot: "Please note that this is a NON-SMOKING flight and passengers are also not allowed to drink their own liquor." Why did the Pilot have to announce that it was a non-smoking flight? Because it turns out that if enough Jack is consumed by an avid tobacco fan, said fan will eventually spark up a butt. This REALLY DID happen on our flight. I wonder who it was....
One of us was lucky enough to sit in First Class.
And it fucking wasn't me!!! Pera actually just sat down in First Class upon boarding the flight. No one ever questioned his seating assignment.
We arrive in Amsterdam. We're groggy, hung over, tired, sleepy and ready to really start the party.
Kill.
Before checking in to your hotel, make sure you hit a coffee shop. You want to have yourself a nice cafe au lait.
Mmmmmmmmmm, nice coffee bean.
Happiness as defined by the freshest Heineken from the tap.
Mmmm Mmmmm Mmmmm. Best. Beer. Ever.
A wild animal ran amock our hotel.
A wild animal exposed itself amongst our hotel.
Sober? I think not.
Sober? I think not.
Sober? I think not. Ladies and gents - meet Karpet. Our young friend from Rome. He would not leave this trip the same as whence he arrived.
Sober? I think not.
Sober? I think not.
More pix coming...
Posted by evil at 08:27 PM | Comments (6)
Comments
HEY WHO IS THAT MIDGET IN ALL THOSE PICTURES!! HE LOOKS LIKE A GAY MIDGET TOO.
Posted by Robert Plotkin | 04/26/05 @ 07:17 AM
oh that was me that posted that comment, look at the time, when am i ever up that early. I did have some onion sleep over by the name of pete.....and we all know what time he wakes up in the early morning and gets on the computer and on the phone and pranks all of us!!!!!!!!
Posted by | 04/26/05 @ 10:14 AM
Where is my 60 EURO!!!!!
Posted by Karpet | 04/26/05 @ 10:15 AM
Dude is that the gay guy from project runway???
Posted by KIDD | 04/26/05 @ 11:04 AM
Where the hell is my camera?
Posted by sober | 04/26/05 @ 01:11 PM
No dirt in Amsterdam. WTF dude !!
Sick time nevertheless